Welcome to
 The Joyful Musician Blog

After years of sidelining his voice, a classically trained tenor facing burnout, shame, and crippling performance anxiety did something quietly radical: He showed up to his first audition. Not to impress, but to reclaim. This is the story of the audition he didn’t cancel — and the slow, brave return to a life shaped by presence, not perfection.

A 35-year-old opera singer was at a crossroads. Having taken a break from her career due to intense stage anxiety and crushing perfectionism, she was questioning everything: Was opera still right for her? Should she shift to another path entirely? All she knew was that singing had once been her lifelong dream — but now, even that felt uncertain.

Learn how to choose between PACT and HARD goals to support your growth as a musician — whether you need steady action or bold emotional commitment.

A few years ago, I had a student — let’s call him James — who was enormously talented but utterly paralysed by performance anxiety. He had a voice that could hush a crowded room and make grown men weep (a critic's words, not mine!). But the moment the stakes felt "real" — auditions, recordings, even posting a short clip online — he would retreat. He’d convince himself he wasn’t ready, or that no one wanted to hear him anyway.

Despite her experience and undeniable talent, she often felt disconnected from her voice. Some days, her anxiety showed up physically — tightness in the throat, sweaty palms, racing heart… Other times, it felt like her voice belonged to someone else entirely, creating a disorienting, almost out-of-body sensation. Her inner critic was relentless, especially during live performances. And even when things seemed to be improving, the sense of insecurity lingered.

When I first began moving away from teaching SMART goals, I wasn’t entirely sure what would fill the gap. I just knew this: My clients — highly capable, fiercely creative musicians — weren’t failing because they weren’t "measuring" things properly. They were falling apart because their goals sat almost entirely outside their Circle of Control. And for many of them, goal-setting had quietly become another form of self-punishment... A game rigged against them from the start.

A French horn player in her 30s performing with a major orchestra, delivering over 200 concerts a year. But even from that place of achievement, something vital had gone quiet: She no longer enjoyed music. Despite her outward success, she felt disconnected from the very thing that had once lit her up. And she was preparing for two important auditions: One for a prestigious commercial TV orchestra, and another for an even larger city’s top ensemble.

A classically trained opera singer with both a BA and MA in vocal performance, they had been performing professionally for over a decade. Their voice had a shimmering coloratura and an expressive depth that made it easy to imagine them on any of the great opera stages. They were already performing regularly in a beloved opera choir. But they hadn’t trained for years just to stay in the chorus — they wanted to sing arias under the lights, solo, centre stage.

This amazing client was a seasoned singer and singing teacher in his 50s — deeply experienced, full of musical wisdom, and running a very full studio. Between teaching and performing, he’d still managed to carve out time to create something deeply personal: His debut album. After months of work, the release concert was on the horizon. But instead of excitement, he was feeling uneasy. He came to me for a single coaching session not to improve his singing, but to figure out how

A gifted flautist in her early 30s had built a dream career: First chair in a major orchestra, well-respected by her peers, and known for her dedication and precision. On paper, everything looked perfect. But under the surface, she was carrying a weight that made performing feel like a burden rather than a joy. Years earlier, a careless, cutting comment from a conductor during a recording session had planted seeds of self-doubt.